Three Conservative MPs have quit their party, citing differences over Brexit policy, but mainly to re-form popular noughties girl band the Sugababes.
“They always had a bit of a changing line-up, and we thought, well, politics isn’t much fun right now, what the world real needs right now is the Sugababes, mark 12” announced Anna Soubry, who it is understood will be filling in Keisha Buchanan’s former role in the group.
Mutya Buena replacement Sarah Wollaston added: “Sure, the Tories will miss us like a hole in the head, but I honestly only ever saw party politics as a stepping stone in my long-term dreams of pop stardom, and with Brexit sending Britain down the sh***er, now felt like the right time to ‘push the button’ on a world tour!”
Heidi Allen, virtually a dead ringer for first-ever replacement Sugababe Heidi Range, insisted they have no regrets, and aren’t leaving the country in a lurch. “You’d be surprised how many freaks like us are considering quitting politics for showbiz. Labour are too lost in Jews, and looking at the ERG, things are definitely about to get Ugly.”
With several other MPs said to be considering quitting their party, it is understood that this new Sugababes line-up may only be temporary if the chemistry fails. There are whispers that Joan Ryan may now be looking for a new challenge, and has a serious set of pipes.
By David and Daisy Bard
Image: Mandy Coombes