A London commuter has managed to avoid making eye contact with anyone else for eight weeks, despite taking the tube to work on a daily basis.

Brixton resident Trisha Ojo, 45, takes the Victoria Line to central London twice daily, at rush hour, yet has somehow managed to go without looking at another helpless, damaged soul in the eye since late November.

“I’ve bumped into a lot of things,” Ojo said. “Advertising boards, suitcases and quite a few buggies.”

“But it’s been totally worth it not to have to look into the yawning chasm of a fellow commuter’s crushed, lonely gaze at 7 a.m. on the way to Vauxhall.”

Ojo last looked at another being on Tuesday 27 November, whilst reading a copy of the Evening Standard on her way home from work.

“It was just so horrible” she said, wincing as she recalled the incident.

“There was a guy opposite me. I had headphones in, and was staring at the paper, but I could just feel him trying to initiate a flirty glance.

“I looked up in the hope he’d got off, but he was still looking. Then he smiled at me – he may even have tried to wave. It was traumatic.”

No one should have to go through the trauma of prolonged – or even momentary – ocular jousting with a complete stranger.

If you’ve been a victim of unwanted eye contact on the tube, contact the British Transport Police, on the f**king phone, while staring at your feet, as all interactions should be conducted.

By David and Daisy Bard

Image: J Cornelius